Accountability

And Why It’s So Important

Photo by Renáta-Adrienn on Unsplash

For a long time, my life wasn’t my own, and revolved around someone else. I’m not saying this to try and get sympathy, or because I resent it, but it’s just the truth. This is the life of a carer. This was my lot.

The thing is that now; as I am becoming accustomed to not being a carer, I am having to re-learn what I’m doing with regards my own personal goals, and I am having to re-learn how to structure my time now that I’m not having to fit things in around my caring responsibilities.

Just lately, a very good friend of mine began studying again. She has been using timers to make sure that she is getting a certain amount of studying done per week. This seems to really be working for her, and so I decided to try a similar sort of thing.

However, I have found that working with a weekly target doesn’t seem to work for me. If I have a bad day, I can talk myself into the idea that there’s no possible way of my meeting my targets, and so I give up and start again.

So, this time, I am trying the same tactics, but I’m totalling up my hours for the whole month, and I’m hoping that this way, I can actually stick at it.

Accountability is so important here, especially with us writers, whose only goal setters are ourselves.

So, I’m posting this here as a practice in accountability, and this is my promise to myself that I will write another post on the 20th of June, where I will hopefully be able to tell you that I have succeeded and hit all of my targets.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Journaling

Journaling

And why I keep one.

I have kept a journal in one form or another, since I was about ten years old.

I remember when I first made the decision. I had told my uncle that I wanted to be a writer, and his response (apart from telling me that there would be lots of rejection), was to tell me that if I wanted to be a successful writer, then I would need to start the practice of keeping a journal. I stated that very day, in a little, spiral bound notebook, where I had to write the date myself.

I don’t look back at those journals often, but its a nice feeling, knowing that they’re there.. pieces of my younger self, preserved in paper form, within a book.

My way of journaling has changed, grown, and developed over the years. At first, I only used words; Now, though, I use a mixture of words, poetry, and images. I’m still learning about new, and different journaling techniques. I don’t honestly ever think that I’ll stop learning, and you know what? I’m totally okay with that.

Over the years, my journals have been supporter, confidante, and friend, sometimes when I felt like I had no-one.

The thing is that having a journal means that you always have a way to get all of those horrible, messy, nonsensical thoughts out of your head, and, trust me-it really works.

I don’t know if you already journal, or if you’ve never even considered it, but I would really, highly, recommendit. It is a lifelong practice for me, and I can honestly say that it has only ever served to enhance my life.


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Timescales In Writing

Timescales In Writing

An Experiment

Photo by chuttersnap on Unsplash

I’m taking a writing course, and at the moment, I’ve been looking at genre fiction. The thing is that, while I’ve looked at genre fiction before, and I know what it is, something in the notes made me realise something that I’ve not really considered before.

That something, is time. Most of my writing projects have taken place over a seemingly infinite time period. What I mean here is not that I allowed myself infinite time to finish a piece (obviously, that would be ridiculous) but that the stories themselves don’t seem to have a specific time frame for me to work with.

I plan to change that. Today, I begin planning a novella in parts. Seven parts, to be exact. The idea is that each part will cover one day. The story will, therefore, be told in the time span of a week.

I have a few ideas bouncing around at the moment, but nothing particularly concrete, and you know what? I’m actually okay with that. While I will plan the story, I am quite happy to give my imagination free rein to come up with the story that it wants to tell. My only restriction is that it must all happen within the space of a week.

I don’t know how long it will take me to write this, but I will keep a log during this time, and hopefully I will update you soon.

Have any of you ever come up against this? Have you written something set within a specific time frame?

Let me know in the comments. 🙂


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Fiction

Fiction

And why it isn’t pointless..

Photo by Janko Ferlič on Unsplash

Recently, I was reliably informed by someone who will remain nameless, that they didn’t read fiction; that it had absolutely no point, and that it would not add anything to their life.

Their claim was that there are plenty of factual books out there, and that there was no need for fiction.

As a writer, I took this comment particularly personally. To the person that said it, it was probably nothing more than a throwaway comment, but it wasn’t for me. For me, it felt like, and indeed, it was, someone cutting down my first love.

The thing is that fiction and storytelling in general, have an incredibly important point to them. They allow us to convey things to some people, who might never read a non-fiction, or reference book about the subject.

Reading is so important, and fiction encourages this in a way the no non-fiction book can. Truthfully, it is far easier to get lost in a story than it is to get lost in the pages of information shown in a non fiction book.

This is not to say that I don’t see the value in non fiction, because I certainly do. I read both types of writing, and enjoy them both in different ways, and to varying degrees, but when it comes down to it, on a sunny afternoon, if I am to sit in the garden with a book, it is more likely to be a copy of a Harry Potter novel, than it is to be a book about productivity and sales management.

That’s the thing with fiction. It is, without a doubt, the most basic, and fundamental source of magic that there is, and if you haven’t managed to open a book, and look up five hours later, when it’s three o clock in the morning, then you simply haven’t worked out how to harness this magic.

As a writer, I am privileged enough to be able to wield this magic; to bend and shape it into a story, and this is what I truly love.

I imagine children at bedtime, asking their parents for just one more story. I imagine them slipping from their beds, right inside the story, until it is so real to them that they could reach out and touch the characters.

I think this is what adults have lost over their years on this earth. They lose the ability to see the magic in stories, and this is something that needs to be regained before they can even begin to see and appreciate the value and point of fiction.

So, I guess what I am saying, is that I pity the person that told me that fiction is pointless, because they are closing themselves off from whole other worlds, which would be open to them, if only they were to open a book, and read a story.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Forgiving You

Forgiving You

The battle within

Photo by Felix Koutchinski on Unsplash

Of all the possible emotions to feel, anger is one that I really struggle with. Most people who know me, know that I don’t really ‘do’ anger. It confuses and scares me.

However, lately I have been feeling angry; angry and hurt. I’ve posted a couple of times in the last couple of months about friendship, and I’m now, more than ever, feeling incredibly let down and hurt by someone that I thought was a friend.

I don’t think this person knows this. I don’t think that they are even aware that the friendship has ceased. They are very busy, with an awful lot on their plate, and I don’t think that they actually have any more space for another person.

The thing is, that I don’t mind if that’s the case, but the total inconsideration is something that I’m really struggling to get past.

On Sunday, it was my birthday. The person in question didn’t even realise that I wasn’t where I usually am on a Sunday morning. They didn’t wish me a happy birthday, and I haven’t heard anything from them except to ask for something that they wanted.

And you know what? That. Hurt. It really hurt. Over the last few days, I have found myself dwelling on this, and several other incidences, and I realised today that it’s eating me up inside, and that I really need to let it go.

I don’t have space in my life any more, for things, and people that cause me heartache. I don’t think I’m even angry any more. I’m just over it. I don’t know if I can fully forgive this person yet, but I am going to work on it, but in the meantime, I refuse to let them take up space in my thoughts and in my life. I’m just done.

I’m hoping that by blogging about these feelings, I will be able to release them a little, and that in doing so, it will make forgiveness just that little bit easier.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Doris Day

Doris Day

A goodbye to a star of my childhood.

I very rarely write posts or status updates when celebrities pass away. I feel that their families have the right to mourn in peace. I’m not trying to get at those who do post, but for me, it’s something I will think on in private, as a general rule.

Today is the exception.

Today, I learned that Doris Day died in the early hours of the morning, at her home, at the age of 97. I won’t lie, I shed a couple of tears.

The thing is, that not only was she an amazing woman, and actress. She was an animal lover. I still remember seeing the photo of her, with her dog, posted to social media.

I first watched a film starring Doris Day when I was six years old. I was too young to understand some of the themes, but I loved the music, and I loved the character that she played.

That film was “Calamity Jane”.

I tell not one word of a lie, when I say that I have probably watched that film over 1000 times. When it was on tv, when we only had five channels, I recorded it onto VHS, and I watched, rewound, and watched it over and over again.

When my life wasn’t going well, I would curl up in a sleeping bag, and watch that film, and imagine that I was somewhere else.

The simple truth is that when some of the bullying was at it’s worst, Doris Day, and Calamity Jane, kept me sane.

So, today, I am sad that one of my childhood heroes is no longer here, and I am glad that I am able to say these words about her.

I hope that she’s up there now, running free with all of the animals that she’s ever owned, and that she’s moving and singing, just like she did in that film.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Friendship

Friendship

And when you know it’s over.

Photo by Roman Kraft on Unsplash

Over the last couple of years, I’ve learnt a lot about friendship. I’ve learnt that there are people who are true friends, who will be there for you no matter what, and no matter how much you try and push them away.

I have also found people who will say that they’re going to be there, but when it comes down to it, they simply aren’t. They are either too busy, they can’t be bothered, or they don’t have the time, and you know what? I’m learning to be okay with that.

I’m learning that these are people who aren’t really friends, and while I would have been desperately upset about it a couple of years ago, now I am confident in those people that I can call my true friends; those people who I could call in the middle of the night, and know that they would be there for me.

Over the last couple of months, I have been coming to terms with the fact that someone I thought of as a friend, not only isn’t, but that they never really were in the first place.

Now, I would be lying if I said that this realisation didn’t hurt, but as I’ve spent the time getting used to it and accepting it, in a way, it feels like a weight off.

In the past, I would have felt compelled to try and make things right, and to try and ‘mend’ the friendship, but the truth is that some friendships are just not reparable.

This is one of those friendships.

So, how can I tell?

1. This person and I have not had more than a two minute conversation in over a year.

2. It always falls to me to make the first contact.

3. They are only interested in me when it comes to asking me to do something for them.

4. They will abruptly end a conversation with me when I dare to start talking about something other than them.

5. They don’t value me. Not as a person, nor with a view to my chosen vocation.

I know this sounds very harsh, but it’s the truth. It’s a hard, and painful truth to accept, but now that I have accepted it, it feels like a huge burden has been lifted. I no longer have to fight for a friendship, which, quite frankly, isn’t worth saving.

I know how hard the decision to end a friendship is. I know how much it hurts. I’ve been there; and the only thing I can say to you now, is that if you are going through a similar thing, you can do this. You can be the one to call it a day. You are worth more than a half hearted, façade of a friendship, and when you realise this, you too will feel lighter for letting that friendship go.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Introverts

Introverts

And What It Means To Be One

Photo by Stefan Spassov on Unsplash

I am a classic introvert. I enjoy my own company, and I don’t generally get lonely or bored. I guess part of it comes from being an only child, but I know a number of introverts who have siblings.

The thing is, as an only child, I didn’t automatically have other children to talk to or play with at home, so I had to rely far more on my imagination.

I am so grateful for that, because it has allowed that imagination to develop, which, along with reading lots and lots of books, has fed into my writing.

What I’m trying to say is that people often see being an introvert as a bad thing, but it isn’t. It is no better or worse than being an extrovert; it is simply different, and that’s okay.

So take some time this week to embrace your inner introvert, because when it comes down to it, it is a big part of you, just as it is a big part of who I am.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

Dogs

Dogs

And Why They Are THE Best Companions

Photo by Hannah Lim on Unsplash

I love all animals. They can be cute, funny, annoying, or all three, but the thing is that they are always honest. There’s none of this back stabbing and talking behind the others’ backs. They simply find a way to exist with each other.

I have always had pets. I can’t remember a time… in fact, I am certain that there has never been one, when I have not had an animal of some kind as a companion.

Dogs have always been there, and as far as I am concerned, my house would not be a home without one. They give such unconditional love, and are always there, waiting for a kind word and a bit of a back scratch. I really cannot even comprehend the people who choose to deliberately hurt them. In fact, I believe that there is a special place reserved for them in the fires of hell, but that is a topic for another day.

I adopted my dog from a rescue about seven years ago. She is a chihuahua, Yorkshire Terrier cross, who has enormous ears, a tiny frame and a personality to match the ears. She also seems to think that she’s a German Shepherd.

She is my world. I love her to pieces, and she has gotten me through some truly dreadful experiences. She is so completely tuned in to me, that she will wake up from a dead sleep if I am crying and come over to comfort me.

When I am having a bad time with my depression, she just comes and curls up in my arms. She gives me kisses to try and make me feel better and has a tendency to try and lick away any tears.

She knows when I am anxious and comes to me, and has, on several occasions, prevented me from being hurt.

She is so tuned in to me that when I have a nightmare, she will lick me and paw at me until she has woken me up. Then, she will snuggle with me, and generally, stay awake to make sure that I am okay.

Now, some of you reading this might say that I’m crazy, and maybe I am, but I’m just telling you how it is for me.

I do know one thing for sure; without her, I would be completely lost.


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.

She Said

She Said

A Poem

Photo by freestocks.org on Unsplash

She said that I was stupid,
She said she didn’t care.
She said that I was on my own,
That I wasn’t self aware.

She said that she loved me,
She said that she knew,
She made me tell all my secrets,
All my tales of woe.

Then one day she left me,
She just turned and walked away.
She didn’t even look back,
On that dark, dark day…


If you’d like to get updates from me once a week, you can click here… 🙂


Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.