Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
It’s that time of year again…
Why we should maybe look at giving ourselves a spiritual and emotional MOT…
We all know that time… the dreaded day when we have to take our car in to the garage for it’s annual MOT. The time when we sit, waiting tensely, desperately hoping that it will pass and not cost us too much.
The thing is, we spend a lot of time worrying about it, and yet, we can go from year to year to year, without even considering giving our minds an MOT. We only ever seem to think about our minds, when something has gone wrong. We only ever really look at how we’re feeling if we actually need to. If you think about it, we actually give more attention to our cars than we do to our own minds.
I’m as guilty of this as anyone. I brush aside concerns, and chastise myself, insisting that I should be stronger, and that I should be able to hold things together, when, in truth, it is a sign of strength to be able to really look at yourself and assess how you’re dealing with things.
Sometimes, there might be small things that need adjustment; the odd tweak here and there… but sometimes, we might just uncover what could potentially be an unexploded bomb in our minds, which, if caught soon enough, can be safely disarmed without any major upsets.
The key here, is that we must not be afraid to give ourselves this check over. We check our cars, we even check our bodies, booking ourselves in for an annual check up, so why are we so reluctant to check our minds.
This is something that I’m only just beginning to learn, but already, it’s made a huge difference to me. The truth is, we can only put out fires that we know are there, so we really need to be checking for them on a regular basis.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
When winter comes,
Bringing dark and grey,
And cold winds blow,
The leaves away.
When winter comes,
Scaring birds away,
And squirrels inside,
Their homes do stay.
When winter comes,
And it’s gloves and hats,
Scarves and boots,
And thick warm coats.
When winter comes,
And dormant plants do lay,
No blossom or blooms,
Til’ comes a brighter day.
When winter comes,
I retreat to my cocoon,
To go out in the cold,
Falls to only a loon.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
The butterfly flaps,
Its wings faster;
Fast.
It’s life fast lived,
So much to do,
Before it expires,
And does it really have the time,
To sit amongst the flowers.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
We’ve all done it, haven’t we? Said something on social media that we would never even consider saying to another person’s face. We do it all the time. Sometimes, this is a good thing, and can be cathartic, but other times, it can be not only negative, but detrimental to our, or another person’s mental health.
We’ve probably all experienced it, the feeling that comes when we read something online about ourselves that isn’t very nice. We see it all the time, particularly when it comes to celebrities.
This seems particularly true when there is an event on, which a number of celebrities are attending. Best dressed lists? Worst dressed lists? I wonder if the person that decides who is going to be on the worst dressed list would actually go up and tell those people to their faces that they were going to be on it.
The internet (and while I’m not knocking it, because it isn’t the internet that is bad, but the way that some of us use it), has spawned an entire generation of keyboard warriors, all intent to have their say on this issue, or that.
The thing is, that this form of communication removes the human aspect, reducing a large number of people to disembodied screens with no real feelings, and this simply isn’t true.
When we can’t see the person behind the screen, we can’t see the tears, or the look of hurt on their faces. We don’t see the hours they will spend awake at night, worrying, and we don’t see any of the after effects of our words.
This, essentially, is encouraging us to feel like we can say anything we want, regardless of the consequences for another person, and that’s not right. If this were happening in a school ground, it would be defined as bullying, and yet, in the adult world, it is perceived as okay, and anyone that might happen to get upset, is told to toughen up and that they need a thicker skin.
Of course, there is also the flip side of this, where people can use the internet to feel braver, because of anonymity, and here they are able to share things that they might not ordinarily feel able to share.
Things like the #metoo movement, have given people of all races, genders, cultures, and orientations, a voice, which they might not otherwise have had. And you only have to go to Post Secret, to see a place where people feel safe enough in their anonymity, that they can share some of their deepest, darkest secrets.
The thing is, that the internet, and social media in particular, are not inherently bad things. In fact, it reminds me of a slogan used in the US a lot. “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people”, and while I’m not going to get into the gun debate here, because that is an entirely different post, I can see the truth in the statement.
A gun will not, on its own, engage and discharge itself. To do that, it needs a person to perform an action. It is the same with the internet. These sites do not generate and post their own content; a person is required for that, and herein lies the problem.
A friend and I were talking yesterday, and he said something to me that he’s said many times before. “It’s just a case of being a nice human”, and this is so true.
If we were to focus on being a nice person, then none of the hateful messages, articles and posts would appear online. The cycle of abuse would stop. And yet, it carries on, because somewhere along the line, getting likes, shares, and retweets, somehow became more important that just being kind to our fellow human beings.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
Pain
Twists,
Inside my head.
Hurts,
Throbs,
No small relief.
Nails,
Pound,
Into my ears.
Brain’s
Fuzz,
And makes no sense.
This is my brain tonight.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
I was woken up at 5am, by my jaw, which decided to clench itself so badly during the night, that it gave me a migraine. I staggered downstairs, and got myself some painkillers and some water to take them with, and then went back to bed, where I tried to lay as still as I possibly could, because I didn’t want to risk making it any worse.
At about eight o clock, my miniature dachshund alarm clock demanded to be taken downstairs and let out in the garden. I then fed the dogs, while trying to stay upright, and not let the dizziness take over completely.
For the first half hour after that, I just tried to lay still in the hopes of not angering my jaw muscles any more, but it didn’t really work, and it was at that point, where I had to make the decision on whether I would try and go about my day, or whether I should just give in and rest.
In the end, I made the decision to do a bit of both. I had a pawtrait commission that I needed to work on, but at the same time, trying to do that when I couldn’t really see straight would have been pure stupidity. Instead, I decided to paint another fairy door, because I knew that there were larger areas that didn’t require such precise work.
I forced myself to take the dogs out, partly because I knew that they needed to go for a walk, and partly because I was hoping that the fresh air might help. Although it improved my mood massively, physically, I began to get shooting pains in my ears, and phantom wisdom tooth pain.
So, this afternoon, I chose to rest for a while. The dogs haven’t left me alone all day, almost as if they are playing nurse maid to me, which is very sweet, and definitely makes me feel loved.
The pain is still there, and I can only hope that a good night’s sleep will help to ease it a little. The thing is that this is not me throwing a pity party. I truly mean that. I don’t expect sympathy at all.
It is just one of those things that is a part of having a chronic illness. Many, many people have chronic pains that they deal with on a daily basis, and they are some of the bravest and strongest people I know. Especially as a number of them suffer under the curse that is an invisible illness.
In truth, I often think that invisible illnesses are some of the worst things to deal with, because (to state the obvious) there is nothing to see. People end up feeling like they must prove their conditions exist, and I know a number of people that have endured judgements, and prejudices, simply because someone could not see what was wrong with them.
It is a truly unfair situation. People with all manner of pain and disabilities are often forced to sit in silence because they simply feel too afraid or ashamed to actually say that “Yes” they do have an illness, and “Yes” they are in pain, or exhausted, or worn out, because they don’t know what response they will receive, and you know what?
That really sucks!
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
As a self confessed introvert, I know the importance of ‘alone time’. It gives me the chance to think, and refresh and regroup. I find value in being alone with my thoughts.
This is not to say that I don’t like being social; I do. But in carefully measured doses. The thing is that I find it very difficult to deal with lots of noise, and people talking across each other.
I find my mind wandering, listening to all of the conversations going on around me, even without my trying to do this. The energy my brain then expends on keeping myself present in the conversation I am actually in, leaves me feeling exhausted, and there are times when I just have to get out of that situation, to somewhere quiet, where I can just take a few deep breaths and regroup.
Some people may see me as rude, but that’s not the case. It certainly isn’t what I’m trying to come across as. Sometimes, being in a group of people leaves me feeling so lost, and tongue tied, and (yes, really!) alone. It never ceases to amaze me how it’s possible to feel so completely alone in a room full of people, but it is.
Sometimes (most of the time), I refer to myself as socially inept. The fact is that I’m okay on a one to one basis, and even in groups of two or three people, but any group larger that, and I find myself lapsing into silence, tongue tied and only able to focus on listening to the conversation going on around me.
Even if you say socially inept is too strong a word, I am most definitely socially uncomfortable… and I have had to learn to accept that as simply being a part of my personality, and something that I don’t think will ever change dramatically.
The people who know me well, know this about me, and they also know the me that comes out in a smaller group of people. They know the me that cracks up laughing at the silly things animals do, and the me that cries at the end of movies, and the me that has opinions, and isn’t afraid to express them, and they know the me that has so many creative ideas firing around inside my brain at any given moment that they can almost see the cogs turning.
These are my people.
The thing is, that just because I’m quiet socially, it doesn’t mean that my brain is. More often than not, the quieter I am, the more loud and shouty my brain is being, and I’ve learned to be okay with that too.
Some people who are most definitely extroverts, will say that they can’t imagine anything worse than a couple of hours of solitude, and I can understand that. In the same way that being with people constantly would simply be too much for me, I can imagine that being alone would be too much for them.
The key here is to use the time of solitude carefully and cleverly. It is often in those still, quiet times, that the greatest revelations come to me, and I think this shows in my creative pursuits.
I have found that if I have my time of solitude first thing in the morning, then I am far more likely to have a productive day. I can get on with what I want to do without worrying about anything else, and once I’ve done that, I feel free and lighter, and more able to socialise. I think this is partly because I’ve given myself that time to decompress, and empty my brain.
I know this won’t work for everyone, and there are probably many people who disagree with me, but this is my process. It is what I have found works for me.
Your job is to find a way that works for you, to balance out your need for society and for solitude.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
Yesterday, I really struggled to write. I got so frustrated and angry with myself, because anything I sat down to work on just seemed to come out as unreadable rubbish. I mean, it was that bad, that I found myself cringing.
I was in two minds as to whether I should just give up completely. Thankfully, it was at that moment, that a very well timed email came into my inbox, and I found myself reading the exact advice that I needed at that time.
The email basically said, that even if I had writer’s block, or was worried about writing absolute rubbish, that the best thing I could do was to just push on forward.
It claimed that it was the actual physical mechanism and body memory of writing that was important. It explained it sort of like needing to go to the gym to exercise my muscles, except that this time, the muscle I was exercising, was my writing brain.
It sounds so simple, that it’s crazy, but it really worked yesterday. I got so stuck on my novel that I just ended up opening a blank document, and typing, mostly without really thinking about it.
Free writing is something that I haven’t done much of lately, and yesterday, I was kicking myself, because I think this practice is actually invaluable to me. The act of giving myself the freedom to write… just write… even if it’s complete and utter rubbish, really helped to free me up, and I’ve not felt this inspired in a long time.
I’m not sure if it will work for everyone, but what I will say, is that if you have writer’s block, just give it a try, and you may find that it frees you up and you’ll then be able to write in a far more effective and productive way.
All I know is, that it’s really helped me so much, and now, all I need to do is to remember to do it!
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Writer, artist and crafter. Owner of Rainbow Butterfly Creative. The process of creating something brings me freedom. This is the blog of my life scars and all.
I’ve gotten to the point in my novel where my character is about to fully commit herself to the world of the story. She’s already part of the way there, but she still has one toe in her ordinary world.
The chapter that I’m working on at the moment will solidify her presence in the world of the story. After this chapter, there is no going back for Joey. This is not a fully voluntary choice that she has made, and she feels trapped.
The thing is, I’ve been really struggling with this chapter for a while now, and I think part of it is that Joey desperately doesn’t want to bring that last toe into the story.
All the while that she is half way between the two worlds; all the while that there is still a chance that this is all a bad dream and that she can go back, she can’t move forward in the story.
Basically, she is in her comfort zone.
And I need her out of it, if the story is ever going to move forwards.
At the moment, I can sort of picture her like those memes we see online of dogs desperately clawing at door frames and furniture, while they are carried to their inevitable destination of the horror that is a bath.
Right now, I am wrestling Joey through the house, so that I can dunk her in that bath (metaphorically, of course), and up until now, I have failed. I’ve been listening to all of her excuses why I shouldn’t do this, and yes, I’ll admit, I’ve felt sorry for her, but enough is enough.
Today, she will finally take the plunge, and although it will not always be pleasant, I know that she is strong enough to cope with everything this new world will throw at her.
Li Carter is a writer, artist and crafter. She lives in South Wales, UK, with her family, and five rescue dogs. She’s on Twitter @rbcreativeli , Facebook: Rainbow Butterfly Creative, and Instagram @rainbowbutterflycreative and is the author of My Only True Friend: The Beginning. She is currently working on a new series titled The QuickSilver Chronicles. She is the original Rainbow Butterfly, and wants to fill an ever darkening world with a little bit of beauty and creativity.
Rainbow Butterfly Creative 